The Movie
Update from John – 2/13/2012
Ok, let’s just get right to the point. You’re here because you want to know when the movie is coming out. That’s totally understandable, but for right now, the most we can tell you is that the next screening is at SXSW. And it’s coming soon, so if you want to catch that, you’ll need to start planning. Like right motherfucking now.
The word around the campfire is that none of the films going into The Sundance Film Festival had distribution deals, John Dies at the End included, which means that they’re looking for distributors right now as you’re reading this words. Oh, in case you live under a tree (which I’ve actually done — twice), John Dies at the End premiered at The Sundance Film Festival at the end of January. And even the people who had never heard of the book promptly shit themselves.
Reviews started pouring in from all over, and the overall response was extremely positive. And we’re not talking about small time personal blogs, either. We’re talking about Entertainment Weekly, Ain’t It Cool News, Film School Rejects, and on, and on, and on, and on. It’s been crazy. Take a few minutes to Google “John Dies at the End movie review,” and see for yourself. This is far bigger than we ever dreamed.
It’s important to note that this is not just a bragging right. We’re telling you because with such a positive reaction, it gives the movie one hell of a leg to stand on where distributors are concerned. But whether it has a 3000 theater wide release, or it goes straight to video, make no mistake, we’re not going to keep that information secret. It’s the number one question we’re asked on the JDatE Facebook, and we just wanted you to know that it would not be beneficial to us in any way to have that information and not pass it along. As soon as we know, you’ll know. And we don’t mean, “You’ll know a day or two later.” We mean, “You will know as quickly as it takes us to type the letters and numbers.” It’ll be posted here, and the JDatE main page, and in a standalone article, and on Facebook, and on Twitter, and tattooed on our foreheads. Short of Dave and I showing up to your house and telling you personally, you will know that date. We’re not going to make it hard to find.
Until we get that date, here’s the trailer, located on the movie’s main website. And for those of you just finding out about this whole surreal “internet guy writes book that becomes movie” story, here’s how it all happened…
Don Coscarelli (writer/director/producer of Phantasm and the Bruce Campbell classic Bubba Ho-Tep) acquired the film rights to the novel John Dies at the End in 2007. Since then, a lot has happened, and you’re about to be hit with a full on fist of information right in your neck-heads. Get comfortable.
In October of 2010, Ain’t It Cool News unleashed the story that Don was in full filming mode, and had some news that had until then been kept under the radar. They announced part of the cast (we’ll list the full cast later on this page) and were given permission to show a shot from the set:
Don then began to throw out tidbits of information on his Twitter, which we highly recommend that you follow. He still drops some information from time to time on the status of the movie, and it’s the quickest and most reliable source for movie info.
In November of 2010, Ain’t It Cool announced even more of the cast, including some stars that surprised even us. So now we have the full cast as released by Don, and finally an IMDB page for John Dies at the End. Click the thumbnails for full sized pictures.
Don Coscarelli – Director. Screenplay. Known for his classic Phantasm series of horror films. Also known for his brilliant big screen adaptation of Joe R. Lansdale’s Bubba Ho-Tep, which was a short story which Don gave the utmost respect when translating it to film. He’s our guy, and we couldn’t imagine putting the integrity of this story into anyone else’s hands. For fans across the globe, you’ll be happy to know that Don is one of us. He’s a fan of the book, and he’ll treat it with the same respect that you would give it if you were making the movie.
Paul Giamatti – Paul not only plays Arnie Blondestone, the reporter who Dave talks to, but he’s also the executive producer of the movie. I’d list off all of Paul’s accomplishments, but holy shit, that would take forever. If your TV has ever been turned on, you’ve seen Paul Giamatti. The word on the web is that once he read the script for John Dies at the End, he wanted to make absolutely sure that it got made, so he threw his hat into the ring and offered his services as producer. Check out his monstrous resume on his IMDB page.
– In the order of their pictures, we have: Chase Williamson as David Wong, Rob Mayes as John, and Fabianne Therese as Amy. All three are newcomers to big screen productions like this, which means that we don’t have to worry about big screen egos depicting which direction the characters take. All three are very talented performers, and they know the art of dark comedy quite well. One of the points that is continuously brought up in message boards and whatnot is that the guys look “too pretty” for how they pictured John and Dave. Understand that head shots are supposed to do that. Even Gilbert Gottfried looks awesome in a headshot. Here are a couple of pictures of the guys together, which I believe represent the characters of the book quite well:
Rob Mayes (plays John) on the left. Chase Williamson (plays Dave) on the right.
Clancy Brown – Dr. Albert Macroni. That’s right. Clancy Motherfucking Brown. Starship Troopers. Shawshank Redemption. MR. KRABS! The guy has done such a massive amount of quality work in Hollywood that Dave and I believe that he may be on soy sauce, himself. The guy is a machine, and we’re incredibly honored to have him in the movie.
Glynn Turman – Detective Lawrence “Morgan Freeman” Appleton. Glynn has done TV and movies since before most of the JDatE audience was born, and he does it well. Cooley High, A Different World, The Wire. The guy has some serious credentials on a “we’re not worthy” level.
Doug Jones – North. You’ve seen Doug Jones before, but you probably didn’t know it. A lot of his work and his most famous roles have been in full makeup and costume. Pan’s Labyrinth, Hellboy I and II, The Silver Surfer, and he’s also the Gay Robot from Nick Swardson’s Pretend Time! Look him up on Google Image Search, and you’ll see right away how well he’ll fit in with the JDatE universe.
Daniel Roebuck – Largeman. Daniel was Dr. Arzt from Lost. He also did one of the most uncanny performances I’ve ever seen when he portrayed Jay Leno in HBO’s The Late Shift. He’s a very experienced actor, and he’ll make a kickass Largeman.
Some of the other characters who will be appearing from the book are:
In January of 2011, Quiet Earth released some neat little tidbits: Pictures of the Chinese Restaurant and blueprints for the set of the beloved Mall of the Dead. And two weeks later, Don Coscarelli Tweeted, “John Dies at the End just starting post and VFX. Could be some time. But worth waiting for, I hope!”
Two weeks after that, just last February, Ain’t It Cool News got an interview with Paul Giamatti where he talked about JDatE and producing the movie. And more recently, he gave a quick video interview with ReelNewz.com that just makes me smile like crazy.
So when is it going to be out? Well, IMDB is saying 2012, but I don’t know how much you can trust an estimate like that. The actual shooting is finished, and as Don pointed out in his tweet, they are now working on visual effects. Quite frankly at this point, you know as much as we do. But if you’re one of those people who want to know as soon as the news breaks, you’re in the right spot. We announce news as we get it both on this website, the JDatE Facebook, and our Twitter. Or you can Join the Google group or use our RSS feed.
Either way, this post should bring you up to date on everything that we know so far. And the second we get any more news, you’ll know it five minutes after that.
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October 29th, 2008 at 9:13 am
Early this year, I was thinking of how awesome it would be to have Heath Ledger sign on to play Dave. Then I heard the very next day that he died!
A few months ago, I was considering how awesome it would be if Bernie Mac were able to play Morgan Freeman, and the next day I read that he was dead.
Then a few weeks ago, I was thinking about how great Paul Newman would be for Robert North, and the very next Paul Newman was dead.
I’m starting to think that they know that the truth is about to get out.
October 31st, 2008 at 9:05 pm
Who’s Bernie Mac?
November 1st, 2008 at 12:24 am
I keep getting a 404 error with the Fangoria Magazine link. To the interview. And it annoys me. Because I’d like to read it. Update link?
November 1st, 2008 at 12:27 am
You should maybe add an IMDB thing for the movie its happening? Make it all the easier to see to be honest… PLus ill play anyone
Free actor for the hell of being in it 
November 1st, 2008 at 1:44 am
I had told everyone I knew about your online book: few took the bait. Bastards. Then, just today, I went to Barnes & Nobles looking for a copy… they said it would take $200 and a pre-paid situation to get a copy of your book. Bastards. Your movie better be as good as your book, goddammit. You rock, man! Best of luck!!! I will pay and pay to see the movie!!!
November 1st, 2008 at 1:52 am
Hope they don’t try to cram all the book’s goodness into just one film. I think that is what fucked up the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. They should split it up into 3 to give it the space it needs.
November 1st, 2008 at 5:10 am
crimson_kahuna is right…
TRILOGY!
TRILOGY!!
TRILOGY!!!
..and another trilogy for the book sequel
November 2nd, 2008 at 12:50 am
Oh boy, I am so gonna’ pirate this and help financially ruin you and Don Coscarelli when it comes out.
Hells yeah man.
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:02 am
I’m so excited about the movie, but at the same time I’m very apprehensive. I just hope they do the book justice. And I definitely think that Seth Rogan should play Dave. Or John. Either of them, really. No wait, Seth Rogan should play Dave and Seann William Scott should play John. Yeah, that would rock. Samuel L. Jackson should play Morgan Freeman, Cillian Murphy should play Danny Wexler and Bruce Campbell should play Dr. Marconi. I hafta think about the rest of the characters for a while..
November 2nd, 2008 at 6:40 pm
I think the part of John should be played by the entire band Digital Underground.
November 3rd, 2008 at 10:07 pm
That would be brilliant.
November 8th, 2008 at 4:20 am
I live about [time withheld] from Undisclosed, in the city of Undeclared. If you need any extras, male strippers, or even stunt doubles, let me know, because I have a guy who’s been locked in my basement for two weeks, and I need to get him off my hands before the Search Warrant is approved.
November 13th, 2008 at 11:06 pm
Edward Norton as Dave
Seth Rogen as John
Christopher Walken as Robert North
I’ll post more as more come to me, that’d be a solid line-up for those characters though.
November 15th, 2008 at 7:34 am
It’s much more difficult to emulate the way Christopher Walken speaks through text then you might think.
November 15th, 2008 at 9:19 am
Bruce Fucking Campbell as the priest.
I’m actually going to go see him on the 19th for the My Name is Bruce event. There’s gonna be a Q&A beforehand, I’m absolutely thinking of asking if he’s been contacted for JDatE yet. Why? Because he was Elvis in Bubba Ho-Tep, and the director of BH-T is of course, doing JDatE.
And then I’m going to ask him to sign my penis.
…I don’t actually have a penis.
November 15th, 2008 at 7:12 pm
Christoper Walken has been in every movie ever made.
If he’s not playing a major roll, then he makes an appearance as one of the extras.
In fact, even the first recorded uses with a video camera, early documentaries on Caucasian/Native American relations, Christopher Walken can be seen in the background, hidden amongst the trees, or perhaps half obscured by a teepee.
Some say he is immortal, and is in fact an agent of the devil. I think I agree…
November 19th, 2008 at 2:07 am
Totally seeing Bruce Campbell tomorrow. I tried not to rub it in my friend’s face who couldn’t go, but this sort of slipped out;
“I’ll ask him to sign my penis for you. You know, so it’ll sort of be like Bruce Campbell is inside ya.”
Anyway, here’s hoping I’m not too much of a vagina to ask Mister Campbell if he’ll play Dr. Marconi.
November 20th, 2008 at 1:35 am
Bruce Campbell has never heard of John Dies at the End.
November 21st, 2008 at 4:02 pm
If this movie turns out so suck, either because its just one movie with all 3 climaxes in the book (cuz there was 3 big stories) or because they tone it down (JDatE wouldnt be the same if it wernt as bad-n-nasty as the book)..well im gonna be one mad guy.
November 21st, 2008 at 4:04 pm
also i totally agree with dr. worms lineup so far.
November 21st, 2008 at 5:17 pm
From the first day the movie deal was made I had to come to terms with the fact that they weren’t going to have $200 million to make it. This isn’t New Line making Lord of the Rings here. This is a gritty, indie horror story being made by a director who does fantastic small-scale indie horror movies.
It’s a perfect match and I fully expect what Don to make to be wonderful and memorable and hilarious. BUT I’m not expecting every page of the book to get translated directly onto celluloid. That simply won’t happen and no one ever claimed that would happen. That movie would be five hours long and cost more than Spider-Man 3 to film.
So his job as a writer/director will be to pull out the core of what makes people love the book, the tone, the characters, the absurdity and the horror, and bring that out in a concise, 120-page screenplay.
It won’t hit on all of the scenes in the book, it would be a hurried mess if he tried that, even if had all the money in the world. You wouldn’t want it that way.
November 21st, 2008 at 8:23 pm
So no wave of rot and shit then? Cos I was looking forward to that :]
November 27th, 2008 at 1:31 am
Yeah I get what your sayin Dave, and I would hate for it to be a fucking blockbuster sell-out. But it would also suck if it was like some of the horrible-very-low-budget horror films ive seen made in the past few years that look like a 12 years old got friends togather and filmed it with his moms camcorder, and no scrpit. Giving it is based off a book, im sure its got a pretty solid script. We already know it has a great storyline, so theres no worry there. Either way im sure ill watch it, and love it.
November 29th, 2008 at 6:47 pm
I am actually not happy to hear they’re making a movie of JDatE. This is a book that’s vivid description cannot compete with one’s imagination compared to film. I think it should be a mini series like The Stand, The Andromeda Strain, or other sci fi movies. There is just far too much to fit in such a short span of time. I’ll be sure to watch it anyway. Hopefully it exceeds my expectations.
November 29th, 2008 at 9:46 pm
ukena3824, no.
No no no no no no no.
Have you SEEN The Stand? You know, they’re playing it right now on the Sci Fi channel. Switch over to it and take a gander.
Do you REALLY want JDatE to turn into THAT?
But, you ARE right. JDatE IS one of those books that, like a Stephen King novel, cannot be turned into a movie and be the exact original. In fact, movies that try to do that, like THE STAND, fail miserably.
So, to really put it succinctly…dammit, read comment #21!
December 3rd, 2008 at 10:21 am
Ya’ll come on and see me East Texas!”
As an East Texas resident I have to say that we’re just too awsome to be taken away by the superflu. Texas would’ve become a utopia and safe haven for all men!
Also, I’m glad the guy that’s making this isn’t some big hollywood director. David has made an awsome story and if it was just being made for money, most of the awsome would leave there. I can’t wait to see it!
December 22nd, 2008 at 8:08 pm
Actually Dawn, I was at a friend’s house over Thanksgiving weekend and we were watching The Stand on the SciFi channel as you were posting your comment. Well, I was watching it with her mom. My friend was upstairs puking. Most SciFi channel movies are horrible anyway. *rolls eyes*
Agreed. Some low budget movies are good anyway… take Rocky Horror for instance… I think I can get used to this.
January 1st, 2009 at 5:37 am
How about this for a cast .. Dave and John play themselves?
Maybe?
Idk, i think that would be hilarious
January 6th, 2009 at 3:23 am
jay and silent bob anybody?
i’ll watch the movie if it gets off the ground, but at the same time, do we really want to see how badly somebody can transform this book into a film?
February 11th, 2009 at 4:08 am
The first Beastmaster movie was really awesome, but the sequels were pure, undiluted, putrid, and festering po… Bratwurst.
February 24th, 2009 at 2:06 pm
You should contact fellow goon Brandon Hardesty to act in the movie. I’m sure he’d take it just for the exposure. Check him out on YouTube, and in the trailor for “Bart Got A Room”
May 18th, 2009 at 9:05 pm
Cocks in a fine cheese sauce.
Took me near enough 20 min to get that comment down here, my internet kept fucking up and i couldn’t even make a damned account.
Anyways, good luck with the movie, i look forward to watching it!
October 6th, 2009 at 4:16 pm
I will travel to fucking America to see it if I have to. I’ll also come knocking on your door. I are teh creepy guy.
Serve.
February 26th, 2010 at 9:42 pm
[...] Speaking of blogs did you notice this appear on my personal favourite, The Daily What. I’m not going to lie it worries me, I’ve seen too many sites try BIG changes and end up worse off. Do you remember FormFiftyFive, I used to absolutely love that site then they decided to try and improve it. Now, it’s weird all the same stuff’s still there but its just unnecessarily complicated. Pointless Waste Of Time used to be great too, I think… it changed such a long time ago I can barely remember it. Well apart from trying to get my head around John Dies At The End, they should have made that into a film. Oh fuck! [...]
April 28th, 2010 at 2:45 pm
Any news about the movie? Is it still happening? Has production or casting started? I could play the Jamaican, as long as he is short and white with no tan. Thats how I imagined him at least…
May 6th, 2010 at 4:20 pm
If comment #29 were to become a reality, i would ejaculate dead babies then begin to eat myself from the pure awesomeness
June 19th, 2010 at 12:11 am
Have no cash to buy a house? Do not worry, because this is possible to receive the business loans to resolve all the problems. Therefore take a term loan to buy all you want.
July 20th, 2010 at 2:11 am
I want the movie. Now. Very soon. And if this movie fucks up the best book I’ve ever read in my life, I will not be happy. That’s not good.
Oh yeah…and John better be fucking sexy…
July 22nd, 2010 at 1:50 am
i still want the movie.
i’m about to make it myself!
July 27th, 2010 at 10:47 pm
Whats going on with the movie? Were damn near the middle of 2010 already and theres no sign of it. Did The government take it and wipe it off the face of the earth? Or is it just a hoax like The Broken Lizard’s “Potfest”? I MUST KNOW.
September 3rd, 2010 at 1:32 am
i bet it will be fuckin sexy
September 27th, 2010 at 9:45 pm
So I rented a copy of Phantasm and Bubba Ho-Tep figureing I’d try to familiarize myself with Dons directing style a little bit. I put in Phantasm, but instead of the opening credits the screen remained blank. After I few minutes I figured there was something wrong with my DVD player or something so I hit the eject button. Nothing happened. I hit it a few more times but the DVD refused to come out. As I was dialing the movie rental place’s phone number, a wailing scream echoed throughout the house that kept building and building until the sound of a thousand damned souls screeching in agony filled the entire place. My T.V. screen started to bleed everywhere, blood pouring out by the gallon until my living room was flooded completely. I waded through the mess to my front door and opened it only to be greeted by complete darkness pierced by two burning red eyes. Then, I woke up in my bed.
In my living room the copy of Phantasm was missing. So I put in Bubba Ho-Tep. It was just Bruce Campbell standing there totally naked saying “Who’s your daddy?” over and over again. For an hour and a half.
Please help me, John and Dave. The movie place is getting pissed that I’m three weeks late on returning them and I still can’t find Phantasm.
November 12th, 2010 at 2:43 pm
I’m looking forward to this movie, and I intend to see it at least twice.
November 16th, 2010 at 10:16 pm
Please get Jeff Anderson to be John (AKA Randall from Clerks) – what 2 old now? He has the smarmy-ness
November 29th, 2010 at 1:33 am
I think the part of David Wong should be played by Jason Pargin.
December 30th, 2010 at 10:38 am
How is it not blatantly obvious to everyone here that John should be played by Sean Connery and Dave by Harrison Ford? Plastic surgery is advanced enough now that we can have them looking like they did 40 and 60 years ago respectively.
January 24th, 2011 at 11:29 pm
Several people say Bruce Campbell as the preacher, or Marconi. Why not have him as Dave or John? If you’re using that director, why not an amazing B-movie Horror actor?
February 3rd, 2011 at 9:36 am
But who will play my voice?
April 1st, 2011 at 8:46 pm
Whoever plays Dave has to have a slight paunch… And whoever plays John has to have the spastic energy of a catnip induced feline, yet in such a way that one cannot tell by looking at him. And Edward Norton cannot be Dave. While he is a brilliant actor, and may be able to portray the essence of Dave, he could not pass for Dave. When readers of this book watch the movie, they should be able to look at it and think, “Oh, that must be Dave,” before the self-doubting man even has a chance to speak.
April 8th, 2011 at 9:18 pm
i chose JDatE for my reading response logs at school and after writing the second one i thought to myself my teacher must be thinking that im making all this up haha
April 13th, 2011 at 7:29 pm
still here man, but the charecters from fight club wouild be great
April 16th, 2011 at 2:53 pm
That has to be John in that screenshot.
You look at those clothes and mask and think “Dave’s more of the scholar type…” but that outfit would suit Mr. Cheese quite nicely!
April 16th, 2011 at 2:56 pm
In fact, I’m damn skippy that’s the scene with the home-made flamethrower and all those scientists…
*flashes back to Goldeneye 64*
April 30th, 2011 at 9:45 pm
This movie will be epic. I can’t wait!! Cast selections look great!!!!
June 11th, 2011 at 5:03 pm
Is the movie a different plot from the book?
June 26th, 2011 at 12:47 pm
[...] One spoiler…if John dies at the end, then it’s not at the end of this book. David Wong claims to be hard at work on the sequel but for now we’ll have to be satisfied by the upcoming movie. [...]
July 2nd, 2011 at 9:44 pm
[...] the editor in chief at Cracked, not just because he’s an Internet superstar, not because the movie rights were bought up by Don Coscarelli and Paul Giamatti and it’s going to be released in 2012 – he deserves every [...]
July 19th, 2011 at 10:20 pm
While I was reading, the only person I could picture for Amy was Alyson Hannigan. I cant wait for the movie, I’m sure Don will do a good job.
December 29th, 2011 at 1:21 am
[...] movie looks trippy as hell. John Dies At The End is based on the book of the same name written by David Wong (the nom de plume of Cracked writer [...]
December 29th, 2011 at 12:30 pm
Literally JUST finished reading the book which was the caboose in a relatively long running train including fan faves such as The Alphabet of Manliness, You Might be a Zombie and I’m Better Than Your Kid and umm…The Hunger Games (don’t judge me…I was drunk and weak!). Anyway, the entire time I was reading JDatE I couldn’t shake the notion that John had to have a voice much like Caleb Moody’s Zeke Dunbar from InFamous and InFamous 2. There was just some funny shit being said by this dude that wouldn’t go over well if for whatever reason he sounded like Mike ‘the situation’…
Don’t I feel silly for not knowing until JUST NOW that there actually has been a movie in progress for years!
April 14th, 2012 at 8:03 pm
So…just wondering. Any word since SXSW? I’m dying here…
May 31st, 2012 at 4:22 pm
So… When does the movie come out!? I’m going crazy from all the anticipation
August 23rd, 2012 at 10:55 am
I read the book only a few weeks ago and initially went.. wtf did I just read. It was like being strapped into a fucked up roller-tea cup ride without knowing the purpose or ending of the riding and not remembering how I got on it in the first place. And then, after getting off the ride a few days later and BOOM! a huge grin peeled up on my face and I thought, holy shit! THAT BOOK ROCKED – I have now pre-ordered the second book. Plus, this book has also make me rethink about those colorful squidlike creatures that slither across my room when I sometimes wake up in the middle of the night. I had written them off as a trick of my mind, but now I am not so sure…..
October 14th, 2012 at 2:46 am
THANKS FOR BOTH THE BOOKS! I loved the first one so much. I’ve read it too many times to count. It seriously screwed with how my imagination worked everytime I finished the book; however, its left me permenently paranoid… it was worth it.
I can’t wait for the movie!!! thanks again~